All church program planning is done by the Board of Elders. However, since most weddings are traditionally planned by the contracting parties or their families, the procedure for planned weddings differs from other public services that are conducted by Omaha Bible Church. This Wedding Information Manual is provided to assure a smooth planning procedure for all weddings. The procedure described is followed in order to bring the proper emphasis and meaning to the marriage ceremonies that are performed at Omaha Bible Church.
Let us begin by addressing two topics of concern which usually arise when weddings are in the planning stages.
The first topic relates to the incorporation of philosophies, traditions, music, etc., of the world system into the marriage ceremony. Obviously, the world's point of view of Christ, love and marriage is quite different from the biblical perspective. Transplanting the philosophies of the world into a church does not transform that philosophy, but rather tends to confuse an otherwise clear statement of the Scriptures. It also forces compromise on the part of the Christian. For a clear statement of Christian marriage to be maintained at the wedding ceremony, great care is needed to avoid transplanting the world's views into the ceremony.
A second topic of concern is that the wedding ceremony be a simple and clear statement of a biblical personal commitment between a man and woman before God. This, in essence, is what the wedding ceremony is all about. A wedding with the emphasis that the Word of God places on marriage will be a clear testimony by its very nature.
Procedure for reserving a wedding date at Omaha Bible Church
Fill out and return Bride's and Groom's questionnaires.
Read this manual. It will answer many questions about procedures and fees.
Call the church office for an appointment with one of the pastors (402) 573-1897 or email us. At this time a date can be tentatively reserved on the church calendar.
Bring Wedding Manual and any questions with you to the appointment. The date of the ceremony can normally be confirmed at this appointment.
Background in Scripture for Weddings
The details for wedding ceremonies in Scriptures are few at best. One such account is found in Genesis 24 in the Old Testament where Rebecca was chosen by the parents of Isaac. This family arrangement of the marriage of Isaac and Rebecca was typical of wedding customs in the Old Testament period.
The New Testament provides very little information concerning how wedding ceremonies were conducted. Even so, it is very clear that the conducting of a formal marriage ceremony was the proper procedure for the man and woman who wanted to live together as husband and wife. The question of exactly how they were married is left unanswered.
Actual procedure was apparently determined by local custom and the laws of the land. Weddings seem to have been performed in Oriental fashion, with the families being responsible for both selecting the marriage partners and planning the wedding ceremony. The ceremony was evidently conducted in a somewhat private and secluded manner, followed by a more public reception or wedding feast celebrated at another location (see Matthew 25).
Wedding Procedure at Omaha Bible Church
The following policies are designed to foster an enjoyable as well as Christ-centered ceremony and reception.The elders of Omaha Bible Church acknowledge that the following policies are not prescriptively outlined in the Bible, nor could they be, as the Bible is not a wedding policy manual.However, the public testimony of the church is a great concern and therefore impacts our policies. The procedures outlined below are given for your assistance as a suggested outline of what we think is a properly ordered Christian service that brings glory to God. We do realize that the wedding service is of great personal importance to each couple, and we want to work with you to ensure that you are pleased with the content and tone of your wedding service. Please discuss your desire for your wedding ceremony with the appropriate with the wedding coordinator or officiating pastor.
CEREMONIES Wedding ceremonies, Scripture readings, etc, used at the ceremony are prepared by the staff. The basic ceremony is contained in this manual for your review. Any variation must be submitted for evaluation at least two weeks before the wedding date.
COUNSELING The joining of two lives in holy matrimony must be entered into with all seriousness. It is the couple’s responsibility to make sure that they understand the scriptural teachings concerning the various responsibilities in marriage, especially the responsibilities of each partner as outlined in Ephesians 5. The staff is available to instruct, encourage and reinforce the statement of Scripture concerning responsibility, permanency and unity of the marriage. An appointment for a consultation should be made as soon as possible after the decision to be married. Preparation is accomplished through consultation, premarital Bible studies, and recommended reading.
Weddings are performed at Omaha Bible Church with the understanding that the man and woman have personally trusted in Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior.If neither or only one of the parties is a believer, the marriage cannot be performed by the staff. It is important that in the first counseling session the engaged couple be prepared to give testimony concerning their faith in Christ and how they came to trust Him as Savior.
Premarital Bible studies are organized for engaged couples, and are required as part of the preparations for the wedding. This program is five sessions and covers many of the important issues involved in a Biblical marriage bond, such as the role of men and women as a married couple, the nature and reason for the marriage bond, financial stability, the physical relationship, and communication.
FEES There is a $150 fee payable to OmahaBible Church. This fee is due upon the first meeting with the wedding coordinator. The couple may choose to give and honorarium to the officiating pastor.
PLANNING Wedding planning is done in close association with the Wedding Coordinator appointed by the church. Any matters concerning procedure are discussed and approved by the staff and the Wedding Coordinator.
Following is a list of the Wedding Coordinator’s responsibilities:
1.Explaining church wedding policies, available equipment and fee structure. 2.Consulting with you on all details of your wedding. (Questions concerning the reception, if held at the church, should be directed to the Reception Coordinator.) 3.Enlisting a sound operator. 4.Providing instruction at the rehearsal. 5.Ensuring a smooth procession of scheduled events on your wedding day.
Weddings on Saturdays are usually conducted at 2:00 p.m. (or earlier). Weddings may also be scheduled on some Friday evenings. Generally wedding services may not be scheduled on Sundays or weekday evenings because of the overall church program. The ceremony date should be reserved on the church calendar as far in advance as possible. Ensure that you have first scheduled the date with the officiating pastor.Upon reserving the date, the couple should also schedule their first counseling session with the pastor. The Ceremony and Reception Coordinators should be contacted in a week or two after meeting to further discuss the procedures that are followed in the wedding services. Approximately two weeks before the ceremony the couple should check with the Ceremony Coordinator, the Reception Coordinator and the Pastor performing the ceremony to verify that all details are in order. The responsibility of setting a time for the necessary meetings is incumbent upon the bride and groom.It is essential that all changes of plans are communicated as soon as possible. *Please be sure to review the section entitled Wise Reception Planning at the conclusion of this document.
GENERAL CONDUCT Certain principles of conduct apply to all weddings held in the church building. These are listed below to enable you to inform the members of your families, your wedding party, and your guests. 1.Please do not throw rice, confetti, bird seed, etc., inside or outside the church building. 2.Smoking is not permitted in the church building. This includes dressing rooms and restrooms. 3.Due to liability concerns, the use of alcohol is not permitted in the church building; this includes rehearsal dinners, receptions and the wedding itself.
DRESS The dress of the wedding party should be modest. If a tuxedo is required for the officiating pastor, the rental cost is the responsibility of the couple.
MUSIC Wedding ceremonies at Omaha Bible Church are considered services where the bride and groom publicly profess their faith in Christ and their willingness to submit themselves together to His purpose in their lives. In light of our purpose to worship God in our wedding ceremonies, it is necessary that the wedding couple select all music for the ceremony with this goal in mind.
VOCAL MUSIC There are only two rules that govern the selection of vocal music for wedding ceremonies at Omaha Bible Church.
1.All vocal music must be doctrinally consistent with the common practice of music ministry at OBC. In more specific terms, it must be biblically sound in its textual content.
2.The officiating pastor for your wedding ceremony must be comfortable with your musical selections. All vocal music must be presented to him for his approval no later than thirty days prior to your wedding ceremony.
INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC Instrumental music in a wedding ceremony is functional in nature—serving either as background music for the prelude and postlude or as “walking music” for the processional and recessional. Your selection of music for these elements should serve and facilitate the function—not bring any undo attention to itself, but rather, enable the moment. Your accompanist or instrumental ensemble may be able to assist you in selecting some music that will serve the needs of these moments.
In the absence of a sung text, instrumental music derives its meaning from its style and when applicable, the text that is most often associated with it. Once again, pastoral approval is required thirty days in advance of the wedding ceremony.
PERSONNEL In addition to our emphasis on the music itself being an expression of worship to God, it is also essential that the musicians involved in you wedding ceremony exhibit a testimony of true Christian worship in their lives. A person’s testimony should be your first consideration when considering him/her for a position of musical ministry in you wedding. More specific guidelines are as follows:
1.All musicians participating in a wedding ceremony at Omaha Bible Church must have a personal testimony of faith in Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior of their lives.
2.Musicians for your wedding may be family members, friends of the couple, or members of the Omaha Bible Church body. All musicians must be approved by the officiating minister prior to their being asked to participate in the wedding ceremony.
3.It is your responsibility to see that all musicians have the necessary selections well in advance (approximately 60 days) to insure the quality and comfort of their performance.
DECORATIONS Neither tacks nor tape may be used in the auditorium or reception room.
PHOTOGRAPHS Photographs may not be taken during the ceremony, with the exception of the processional and the recessional. After the recessional and after the receiving line are finished, the wedding party may return for as many pictures as desired. Photographs must be completed 45 minutes before the wedding ceremony begins.This is crucial.Please inform your photographer of this for scheduling purposes.
Any videotaping must be arranged by the couple.
OFFICIAL Church staff members perform all weddings at OBC. It is not the regular practice to involve family or friends in an officiating capacity.
ORDER OF SERVICE A suggested basic order of service:
Prelude* Lighting of Candles Grandparents Seated Groom’s Parents Seated Bride’s Mother Seated Wedding Processional Wedding Ceremony (see outline Format) Wedding Recessional Bride’s parents Ushered Out Groom’s Parents Ushered Out Congregation Dismissed *Continue throughout seating of guests
CEREMONY FORMAT(do not deviate from this format unless approved by the pastor)
Welcome Prayer Giving of the Bride Affirmations of Faith Special Music (Selection #1)* Spiritual Instruction Exchange of Vows Giving of Rings Lighting of Unity Candle (optional) Special Music (Selection #2)** Official Pronouncement Embrace Official Introduction
*Placing special music between the Affirmations of Faith and Spiritual Instruction is ideal because it allows for a break between two lengthy components of the ceremony.The Affirmations of Faith component is longer because it is followed by a gospel presentation by the officiating pastor. **A second special music selection is not required, but if desired, after the Giving of Rings and during the Unity Candle provides smooth flow.
POSITIONING OF COUPLE AND PASTOR Depending on the format of the platform, you may have the option of having your backs toward your guests with the pastor facing them or to be facing your guests with the pastor’s back toward the guests.Each format has strengths, though most guests would prefer to have you facing them.
SAMPLE VOWS
Option 1: More Traditional I, Sean, take you Mary, to be my wedded wife, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part or the Lord comes for His own.To you I pledge my faithfulness.
I, Mary, take you Sean, to be my wedded husband, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part or the Lord comes for His own.To you I pledge my faithfulness.
Option 2: More Contemporary I, Sean, before God who brought us together, take you Mary, to be my wife, to love and cherish you even as Christ loved the Church and gave Himself for her, to lead you and share all of life's experiences with you by following Christ through them. That by His grace, we might grow together into the likeness of Jesus Christ, our Savior and Lord.
I, Mary, before God who brought us together, take you Sean, to be my husband, to love you, cherish you, to submit myself to you in all things, and to follow you through all of life's experiences as you follow Christ.That by His grace, we might grow together into the likeness of Jesus Christ, our Savior and Lord.
RECEPTION Wedding receptions will be directed by personnel appointed by the church. All those who serve at the wedding reception should be at the church to meet with the Reception Coordinator thirty minutes before the wedding ceremony begins.
The wedding reception coordinator will provide you with a list of what is provided by the church and what you will need to provide.All family-furnished reception items should be brought to the church at the time of rehearsal, unless other arrangements have been made.
Music played at the reception must follow the policy for the ceremony as seen above under MUSIC and VOCAL MUSIC.
REHEARSAL The officiating pastor is in charge of the rehearsal. He will be assisted by the Wedding Coordinator, who will direct the procedure concerning the processional and the arrangement of the wedding party members. Please inform your wedding party to arrive early so the rehearsal can begin as scheduled. The marriage license should be brought to the rehearsal and given to the officiating pastor. To ensure a smooth ceremony, all members of the wedding party (including ushers, grandparents, etc) need to attend the rehearsal.It is the couple’s responsibility to have the wedding party in attendance.
At the rehearsal special music participants will not rehearse their pieces.Here they will learn their cues and timing for taking their places on stage.They must practice together some time before the rehearsal (just prior to it is fine) and meet with the sound technician to do a sound check.It is their responsibility to make this appointment.
NEBRASKA MARRIAGE LICENSE LAWS
LICENSE:
1.Both men and women age 17 through 18 must have consent to marry in Nebraska.
2.No man or woman under the age of 17 can marry in Nebraska, even with parental consent. 3.First cousins or closer cannot marry in Nebraska. 4.All divorce decrees must be final. The license can be obtained from:
CONSENTS: 1.Only one parent needs to sign the consent if parents are living together and both consent to the marriage. 2.If parents are divorced, the parent awarded legal custody and control of said minor must sign the consent. 3.If parents are separated but not legally divorced, both must consent to the marriage and sign the consent. 4.A legal guardian appointed by the Court may sign . 5.All consents must be written and notarized.
FEES: Marriage License: $15.00 APPLICATION BY MAIL: 1.It is possible to make application for a marriage license by mail if one or both parties are out of town. 2.Upon request, an application blank will be sent to the parties for them to complete and sign before a Notary Public or County Judge. 3.After completing the form, they send same back to the office of the County Judge with certified copies of their birth certificates and the $15.00 fee.If consents are needed, they send these at the same time. 4.Upon receipt of the above items the license will be issued. 5.
CHECKLIST FOR BRIDE AND GROOM This checklist is to give a general time schedule to help in your planning.It is not meant to be a directive of what must be done, and not everything listed will be applicable to every wedding.
Upon Engagement: ·Read through the Wedding Information Manual ·Have conference with pastor to arrange day and time. ·Make reservation for church use for both wedding and reception.If reception is not held at OBC, you may need to make other arrangements. ·Schedule meeting with Wedding and Reception Coordinators
Twelfth week before wedding: ·Learn the policy of the church regarding costs, decorations, etc. ·Make arrangements with pianist and vocalist ·Select members of wedding party
Eleventh week before the wedding: ·Make out wedding invitation, reception and announcement lists ·Order invitations and announcements.
Tenth week before wedding: ·Select and get commitments from additional helpers as needed (ie-reception servers, guestbook table, gift takers, host and hostess, ect.) ·Choose general color scheme and flowers.
Ninth & Eight weeks before the wedding: ·Arrange date, time and place of rehearsal dinner. ·Music approved and copies given to musicians.
Seventh week before wedding: ·Make arrangements with florist. ·Order programs for wedding ceremony and printed napkins, etc. for reception. (optional)
Sixth week before the wedding: ·Select gifts for attendants. ·Arrange for housing of guests from out of town. ·Buy wedding rings.
Fifth week before wedding: ·Recheck with all attendants to confirm that they will be present. ·Submit a release to newspaper of announced wedding plan, including a picture if desired.
Third week before wedding: ·Make contact with Wedding Coordinator. ·Give a bridesmaid luncheon or tea (Optional).
Second week before wedding: ·Get the marriage license ·Send in bridal picture and announcement for newspaper. ·Meet with wedding and reception coordinator to finalize details.
Last week before wedding: ·Remind all participants regarding rehearsal attendance. ·Alert wedding and reception coordinators of any changes in plans. ·Arrange for newspaper announcements to be mailed the day of the ceremony.
Wise Reception Planning What follows is not a list of “dos” and “don’ts,” but items to carefully consider as you prayerfully plan your wedding celebration for the greater glory of Jesus Christ. It is offered to provoke thoughtfulness in planning your extraordinary day of worship.
With the biblical starting point that everything (including your wedding and reception) is to be worship aimed at exalting Christ (Romans 12:1-2) and is to be done with the greater glory of God in mind (1 Corinthians 10:31), here are some things to consider:
Drinking The Bible tells us that God has given us things such as wine for our enjoyment (Psalm 104:15). But remember that God also considers drunkenness sin (Ephesians 5:18). If you are going to have an alcoholic drink at your offsite reception (alcohol is not permitted at OBC facilities for liability reasons), be sure to show wisdom in this regard. You cannot control the behavior of others, but there are things you can do to sensibly enjoy the good gifts of God and not promote drunkenness. Since this is your wedding day, you do have a leadership responsibility for what happens at your reception.
Dancing The Bible does not forbid dancing so Omaha Bible Church does not either. Additionally, sex is not forbidden (see 1 Corinthians 7:3-5 where it is actually encouraged). But sex is designed by God to be a private act between husband and wife (Hebrews 13:4; also see Matthew 5:28). Therefore sexually provocative dancing that takes place on a public dance floor is not consistent with Christian conduct. If you are going to include dancing as part of your wedding celebration, show wisdom in choosing the music, D.J., and other related issues. Wedding receptions that include dancing are to be held offsite.
Music An additional matter relating to dancing is the music you select for your reception. It would make no sense to testify to your personal allegiance to Christ during your wedding ceremony only to host a reception where Christ’s command to only have good things spoken is violated through your musical selections (see Ephesians 4:29-32).
In working through these issues, remember that while family members may be helping you to plan the wedding day and in some cases even paying for it, you are the one getting married. Remember that Christ Jesus is the Lord of lords who calls us to radical devotion to Him for our good and His glory! Your wedding day is a great opportunity for you to model a Christian worldview that is quick to see the good gifts from God and enjoy them, but wisely.
May the pleasure you find on your wedding day be an act of holy worship focused on our great God and Savior Jesus Christ who is the giver of all good gifts!
All church program planning is done by the Board of Elders. However, since most weddings are traditionally planned by the contracting parties or their families, the procedure for planned weddings differs from other public services that are conducted by Omaha Bible Church. This Wedding Information Manual is provided to assure a smooth planning procedure for all weddings. The procedure described is followed in order to bring the proper emphasis and meaning to the marriage ceremonies that are performed at Omaha Bible Church.